Looking Back
by haveyouseenmyhaggis
Summary: My English work. Epilogue to "Another Life" by Peter Anghelides. Told from Owen's point of view as he looks back over what happened with Megan Tegg. I got a Grade 1 for this! Credit Level writing! Woohoo! Thanks to reviewers!


**Title: Looking Back**

**Summary: Told from Owen's point of view as he looks back over what happened with Megan Tegg.**

**Author's Note: ****In my Standard Grade English class I have to write a review of some sort for the books I read. I read _Another Life_ by Peter Anghelides. The "review" I chose to do was an Epilogue. So, here you go. Enjoy. Please note, it IS based on the book, not the series.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own _Torchwood _and I do not own _Another Life _by Peter Anghelides. Obviously.**

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Remarkable really, Owen thought, how the weather could change so suddenly. That was something that had never failed to surprise him about alien technology. He paused on his doorstep and looked back at his car. There was no evidence that it had nearly toppled earlier that day. He sighed and stepped into his flat block. Now he was almost glad of the seemingly endless flights of stairs. He'd seen the flooding earlier on. Even Ianto hadn't been able to block the rain from the Torchwood entrance via the tourist office. Owen couldn't help but smile when he realised his colleague had failed on that particular mission.

When he reached his flat Owen clicked open the lock and opened the door. He'd been walking through so much water that day that he hardly noticed the pools on the lower levels. He wandered through to his bedroom for a change of clothes and on the way he passed a framed photo of the team resting on the chest of drawers. He paused to look at it.

The picture had been taken at a pub one evening after work. There was his boss; Jack Harkness laughing at a joke someone had told but would probably have been forgotten by now. Jack had his arm around Gwen, the newest Torchwood recruit. There was no doubt that when that picture had been taken her fiancé Rhys would be at home wondering where she was. Then there was Ianto grinning with a slightly unfocused look in his eyes that suggested that this was one of the few occasions that the sensible Welshman had had a little too much to drink.

Beside Owen's own photographic self stood Toshiko. She was holding a glass of white wine and looked relaxed; for once not talking about computer cross-referencing or databases. It was then that Owen remembered that it was, indirectly, Tosh's fault that all this had started. No, he told himself firmly, it wasn't fair to blame her just because she'd improved the graphics and realism of _Second Reality _for him. It was his fault for deciding to use it to recruit people.

Looking again at the photo he wondered if there would have been room for another member. What if Megan Tegg, his ex-girlfriend hadn't died? Would she have been accepted on to the team? He thought of Jack's reaction if he brought Megan to the Torchwood Hub; what would they say? What talents would she have brought to the team? They already had Owen himself as their Doctor. What was the old saying? Too many cooks spoil the broth?

Owen sighed as he threw open the cupboard in the kitchen ten minutes later. A drink, a strong one, was what he needed. He tried to ignore the gnawing guilt in the pit of his stomach and the incessant voice of his conscience repeating the same words over and over, "You killed her Owen…it's your fault she's dead…if you hadn't tried to show her how wonderful your job is she'd wouldn't have been possessed by that Bruydac alien and Jack wouldn't have had to shoot her…"

Owen winced as he downed the shot of vodka. It's sharp taste seemed to bring him back to reality a bit. He shouldn't be torturing himself with the what ifs of the situation. Megan was dead and there was nothing he could have done…except he shouldn't have gotten her involved anyway. Why had he? He didn't quite know how to answer that. He'd left her all those years ago and it should have stayed that way. Had meeting her again on the Internet brought all those feelings back? Being in Torchwood he'd seen more than his fair share of death but loosing someone close to heart hurt badly.

His mind wandered back to Jack, his boss. Jack couldn't die; Owen knew that. Well, he could "die" but he wouldn't stay dead. Jack had never told the team about why that happened but Owen had decided he should thankful for that. If their immortal captain hadn't sacrificed himself, Owen would now be dead. After Megan had died the Bruydac had hopped from one host to another. When it had thought Owen was going to be killed it had hopped to Jack. He shuddered as he thought of the alien device that had been inserted in to his spine to allow that to happen. Everything was a bit of a blur after that.

Jack had been so forgiving about it all too. He hadn't shouted at Owen or put him down for risking the team's lives. "It's not something I'm gonna judge you on, Owen." Jack's words came back to him now. Jack had also been there to offer him comfort; firm but understanding. Once again he heard the Captain's voice in his head, "Hard as it may seem now Megan was part of your life before Torchwood… You're whole existence in A&E, you can't return there. You're so way beyond that now."

Owen knew he was right; Torchwood had, as Jack had said, given him another life. The past was gone and he couldn't go back there. He had to live for now. He had to concentrate on moving ahead, not looking back.

He knew what he had to do but getting to the point where he could do that was going to hurt. His eyes wandered back to the bottle of vodka on the unit top. Grabbing it he threw back his head and drank from the bottle… Hears to a new life.


End file.
